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Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle
Author - Kirill



The Angels are ready to strike without warning and kick some serious butt as they go undercover to retrieve two missing silver bands. These are no ordinary wedding rings. They contain valuable encrypted information that reveals the new identities of every person in the federal Witness Protection Program. When witnesses start to turn up dead, only the Angels can stop the perpetrator, using their expertise as masters of disguise, espionage and martial arts. Good morning, Angels. Get ready to raise hell.

The girls are back to do their thing for that guy in the voice box. You know Charlie. But first, let me start off by saying this guy is CRAZY!



Yeah him. It's McG, the director of Full Throttle. How do I know this? I watched Full Throttle. Yup, that easy. I didn't even have to see that picture of him to know it. Before I go any further, I know many people have wondered what the guy's real name is. Well, to answer that, his name is Joseph McGinty Nichol. I say that's a cool name and no real need to change it to McG...making it McG just makes him sound fake. But then again, he's crazy and maybe he wants that for some crazy reason.

Anyway, what lead me to the conclusion that he's crazy was because of all the crazy, pointless, yet cool shit that happens in Full Throttle. The movie starts off with some ugly guys in a barn or something and the angels trying to save the T-1000 dude (Robert Patrick) and there's loud music and what's her face is riding one of those bulls. Weird things happen, the ugly guys get pissed off but the angels kick their ass, go outside, ram a truck off a bridge or dam or something, pull a helicopter out of the truck, get in and fly off in the last second. Yeah. Then more cool, but weird stuff happens leading to total bullshit at the end, but it's great fun at times. Why? Because I said so. That, and Demi Moore's in it. And she's quite hot. Don't think so? I'd usually call you a fag, but instead, I'll show you a picture:



Now you agree, good. Another thing to show how McG is crazy...look at the damn gun she's holding; a big-ass, gold (I'm pretty sure it started out as silver) desert eagle. You know, to show how bad ass her character is and how McG can find over-sized guns because he's crazy.

Enough about that. I know the real question many people have is: WHO THE FUCK IS CHARLIE?! Well, you can sleep easy now because I'll tell you. It's John Forsythe, you know the guy from all those other movies people haven't seen? I'd give you an example, but too lazy to go to imdb. But the name isn't enough? You too, can't do something for yourself because you're lazy and need to see a picture? Alright, here's one. Edited to be educational too!



Yeah, he's old. Maybe that's why we don't see him? Because he's old? Could be, this movie is aimed towards a much younger audience and the only old people I remember are John Cleese and this annoying hag that's supposed to be Bernie Mac's mother.

Okay, enough of my rambling about stuff. Only other thing I want to say is that every single editing trick is used. From slow motion to speed-ups, to flashes and fast cuts and other things. The camera work is cool though, and fun to watch. I recommend seeing this if you're in a mood to see something stupid but have a good time at it.

That, and McG is crazy.
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